मेरी प्यारी मम्मी, मेरी प्यारी मम्मी।

जब मैं बहुत छोटा था, और अपनी चंचलता और शैतानियों से कईयों  को गुस्सा दिलाता था, घर के सामान को नुक्सान पहुंचाता था, बड़े बूढों को सताता था, खुद को भी चोटें लगाता था, और डांट पड़ने पर जब गला फाड़ के रोता गाता था ,  तो उन सुबकियों में, उस रोने में बस एक ही शब्द मुह से बहार आता था और आता रहता था। मम्मी, मम्मी। रुंधे गले से, मम्मी को आवाजें , मम्मी, मम्मी की पुनरावृत्ति, मम्मी को धुन्ड्ती नजरें, और मम्मी से जाकर चिपक जाने की छटपटआहट . मानो दुनिया "मम्मी"

पर ही ख़तम हो जाती थी. 

वो नासमझ , नादान, छोटा बच्चा भी समझता था कि मम्मी का जोर से सीने में भींचना  और उसकी एक  पुचकार। वही है उसकी हर समस्या, हर दर्द, हर डर, हर आंसू का इलाज़। उसकी हर गलती , हर शैतानी को माफ़ करने की विशालता सिर्फ एक ही ह्रदय में है और वो है उसकी मम्मी का ह्रदय. उस नासमझी की उम्र में भी मेरी वो समझ आज भी उतनी ही सत्य है जितनी तब थी. मेरी हर गलती , हर शैतानी को माफ़ करने की विशालता रखने वाला आज भी कोई और नहीं बल्कि मेरी मम्मी ही है. मेरी सबसे अच्छी दोस्त, मेरी मम्मी .

अपने इन्जीनीरिंग के दिनों में कई बार दोस्तों के साथ भी ये चर्चा हुई की इतना अथाह प्यार कोई कैसे कर सकता है किसी से जितना मम्मी करती है अपने बच्चों से. हे भगवान् , इतना प्यार, हर गलती की माफ़ी, अपना सुख दुःख तत्काल प्रभाव से निरस्त, अपने बच्चे के सुख दुःख के लिये. कैसे संभव है ये. चर्चा में फिर कई द्रशांत आते थे. 

एक चिड़िया का अपने अंडे देने से लेकर बच्चे को उड़ाने तक की अविरत मेहनत, बच्चे के मुख पर दानो को रखना, उन्हें उड़ाने के लिए साथ में उड़ना और गिरने पर चोंच से पकड़ कर वापिस घोंसले में ले जाकर रखना। एक गाय का अपने बछड़े को हर समय अपने सामने रखने की चेष्ठा , उसे चाट चाट कर दुलारना और उसके थोड़ी देर भी आखों से दूर होने पर अश्रु धारा का बह निकलना। और भी न जाने कितने उदाहारण . फिर निष्कर्ष यही निकलता था की मां के प्यार का कोई सानी नहीं।  हमें दुनिया  में सबसे ज्यादा प्यार हमारी मम्मी ही करती है. हम सभी एकमत होकर कहते थे कि हमारी समझ में तो प्यार मतलब मम्मी। 

आज भी इतने वषों के बाद, घर से लौटते समय, लड्डू , नमकीन और भी ढेरों व्यंजन बना के रख देने का अथक प्रयास, रास्ते के लिए खाना, और कई सारी नसीहतें। मैं बदल गया, सब बदल गया पर मम्मी का प्यार वही। अनंत। 

ऐसा कहते है की प्यार को वास्तविकता में परिभाषित नहीं किया जा सकता, उस अहसास को वर्णित करना कतई संभव नहीं है. पर फिर भी बुद्धिजीवियों ने शायद प्यार को एक शब्द देने की कोशिश की और उसकी अतिरेकता को "ममता " कह दिया गया. 

मम्मी, आपके जैसा कोई नहीं। 

S Virus

Recently a very strange virus attacked me and its troubling me a lot. I have started sensing like it has captured my mind completely and taking over the control. 24x7, in day, while sleeping, every damn minute it is leaving its foot prints in my brain. I feel its effects when I see people, I meet them, I interact with them. I don't feel like talking the usual daily life stuff to them. Rather I start watching their cloths, shoes, body, hair for any sign, any scar that can give me some clue, some lead. I kind of feel like investigating the person or start knitting my deductions about him. I feel like a detective who believes in "Science of Deduction".

Yes these are few symptoms of this deadly virus and I am not the only victim. I found many people around me battling with this. The most strange symptom of this virus is that you recommend people to go to its source and victimize them self. Yes, it makes you crazy. It makes you addictive.

Actually this is how I too became a prey to this virus. I was heavily recommended a movie by one of my office colleagues. I managed to arrange a good print of it and when I was watching it, after around 10 mins it attacked me and before I could sense my surroundings I was in its complete arrest. World became a little different after those 2 hours. With every passing day, when I discussed it with people, I found myself part of a Zombie kinda group, where each and every person was displaying the same symptoms and was in search for a new Case. Yes, a new God damn case.

I tried hard on the internet to get cured from this virus and here are my findings. As researched and suggested by some highly qualified and erudite movicians, the only cure to this "Sherlock Virus" is some senseless bollywood movies like Tees Mar Khan, Dabang, Ra.One etc. If these don’t work, then one can watch Gunda but its should be considered as final resort. A joint committee of movicians and doctors have proclaimed “Gunda” treatment as good as “electric shock” treatment. Around one week of daily 2 movies dose is prescribed. Patient then gradually recovers from it and comes back to normal. Things which strictly prohibited are the Sherlock TV series and his novels which can grow the disease and its symptoms exponentially. Also the victims are recommended not to dig the internet for Sherlock stories, discussions, blogs and facts.

By the way, one deduction after my observations of yours. You have hell lot of time reading these kinda blogs.

-A Sherlock fan and Virus victim

Anna's movement: Connecting India, Connecting Indians!!

I became part of it.. Yes I became part of this revolution. I am having this proud feeling of being there and this is not only me whose face is shining in pride. This radiance was present all over the faces around me, waving our national Flag, sporting Tricolor on their body and clothes and roaring “Inqlab Zindabad” and “Vande Matram” nonstop, throwing their heart out for their country, probably first time in their life.

The day was yesterday, 21^st August 2011 and it was the 6^th day of Anna Hazare’s movement against corruption and in support of Jan Lokpal. It was the 6^th day when this 5 feet 4 inch tall, 74 years old man with a white Kurta and Dhoti and a Gandhi cap on his head was on fast. This movement, this call was against the most deeply rooted demon in India, against the very poison which is rushing in India’s blood, against the bug, no Indian is unbitten, this movement was against the corruption.

In the last many decades, probably this is the second time, when the whole India is on the roads, every city, no matter small or big, every Indian, everyone has come in support of this movement, in support with this call against corruption. But this time for an entirely different reason, for a very necessary change. The first time was “Cricket World Cup win in March 2011”. Yes, this is the game of cricket that also unites India.

I went to India gate 2 days back and was feeling very nice being there, among the crowd of thousands of people. But yesterday it was something else. The intensity was much higher and roar was much louder. Some 3-4 lakh people were on the roads only on the way from India Gate to RamLila ground, where Anna is carrying his fast. Everybody was fearless, shouting their heart and soul out with slogans against the government and in favor of Anna’s step, with the pain they bear in their every day’s life due to corruption and a strong will to fight and clean it up this time, yet maintaining the gravity of this movement. Isn’t it amazing that not even a single mishap took place in such a huge march?

Just the feeling of my being there gives me a kick as I saw a different India this time. The India, which was above the religion, casts, politics and regionalism this time. Every age group people, be it a kid of 5 years or a baby who still runs on it’s knees or youth of India or some very old man, who is unable to walk. No body was spared and the reason, why everybody was so charged, so high, was not the Jan lokpal bill or their blind support for Anna but the hope of a change. This movement has given them this hope and chance to get their very rights. I am sure that more than 90% of people, who are supporting Anna Hazare or this movement would not be knowing about much about Jan Lokpal but still they are supporting it with their heart and soul because they are fed up by corruption. Their support with the movement is because they want corruption to end. With this ongoing fast of Anna ji and extremely commendable lead by Mr. Arvind Kejriwal ji and Kiran Bedi ji, they have this hope.

I am sure that this day will be remembered as a big milestone day in the history of India, when every Indian in a true manner came in support of this movement, which is their own fight with an open heart, with an impulse coming from their inner self. I am sure we will win this fight too.

Inqlab Jindabad, Vande Matram, Jai Hind, Jai Bharat!!

The "AGE" - part 2

I was very much hopeful about my friendship with her. My intelligent thinking made me do all the crap, that can impress her any ways. All the morning prayers were on my tongue tip, as if she asked me sometime to sing some prayer for her. Thats all you can do to impress a prayer girl. I did not want to miss any bit of my chance. But things were going like I were doing all this in some other universe. She was happy without me, without an extremely talented boy, with all the prayers on his tongue tip and ready to come out on her demand. I was ready to win her heart but ????? I was not getting the start. Time was racing up with me and my chances were dimming faster than anything. She had only one more year left in school. Those who ever fell in love can actually feel that 1 year is like no time in these cases. Only 1 one more year, and a novice lover like me, who just stepped in his school. Time became cruel to me and 1 year turned to 11 months, 11 months turned to .....to 5 months. In all this time of whole world, one thing I never missed, Glancing at her sideways during prayer. Perhaps God realized my true inclination towards her and gifted me that chance, the chance of a life time, a chance to reach her, to talk her, to impress her and finally to win her. Lets look, how did I get this chance ?? Oneday during lunch time, I found a guy, dancing around her, doing all the Jugglery and all the silly, idiotic things one can do. And ... and like other girls she was liking that (This universal fact was known to me by ages but I realized it during my engineering days). She was rolling into laughter for every damn thing that guy was doing. I, burning into ashes, looked at that guy, my biggest enemy, and my expressions changed instantly. He was my cousin "Raja", 4 months elder than me. I guess, he was completly utilizing that 4 months extra experience. I again waited for school to end and coming back home. The clock ticked to my favorite help seeking time " After-school lunch time" and I asked Raja " Tum us Moti vali ladki ko kaise jante ho"??.
"Kaun Moti vali ladki"??
"With whom you were playing in lunch time"
"Oh! that girl. She is my very good frnd".
How come????
"I was playing in school ground last week, she came to me and told" Tum kalabaaziaa bahut achhi khate ho" bas fir kya tha, I repeated the same and she became my friend." but why are you asking me all this?
"I too wanted to be her friend". A true and innocent answer. What can you expect from a 5 year kid ?? Bare innocence.

I had the key to impress her so I had to wait for next school day. Next day during lunch interval time I started all the jugglery before her, obviously better than Raja. But what the hell ?? She was acting like, she is not noticing me at all. Of course, she was pretending not to notice me, otherwise that jugglery was perfect to win a girl. Lunch ended and I continued the same for several more lunch intervals. All waste !!

Because of such overwhelming misfortune I had lost all hopes for her. But Life has always something unexpected for you. Perhaps this old adage was meant for me. That day something happened, one can expect least. It rained that day. Yes, gravity was working for me and it rained such heavily as if all the clouds turned into water at same time. Clock were showing 1:55 PM, 5 minutes before the school end time. In effect to this heavy rain, students using Rickshaw were asked to wait for rain to stop. My cousin sister came to me and took me to her class. Its always the responsibility of elders to take care of their younger ones and my sister was very good in that. As destiny had decided for me, that "Moti vali saheli" of didi was also in the class. I started feeling like splash of redness of roses. My heart started flying to touch the sky. I found myself in uncontrollable state as I went to didi and reminded her that I wanted friendship with that Moti vali saheli. My sister smiled and went to that girl. My dream girl. I saw didi saying her something and she glanced at me. I guess, its the first time in this heartless world, she noticed me. She turned and started walking towards me. My heart was beating faster than shatabdi and I was chosing the right words. I blinked my eye and she was standing just on my head. I opened my mouth to say something and blinked my eye again. but what is this? Why there is so dark all around? What the hell is this whistle sound in my ears? And .. and how my cheeks are getting so warm abruptly? A bit pain too ...! And now this shout .. How dare you calling me "Moti"?, Main tumhe moti dikhti hu? One more slap on my face and I started crying. The rain God must had changed the source of rain water. Now its coming out of my eyes. I cried very hard repeating a single word again and again " Mummy". All the caring elder sisters get disappeared when you really need their support. I kept crying and probably the rain stopped outside as we got call from our Rickshaw vala Bhaiyya.

The "AGE" - part 1

I had a great confusion during my teen times. Whats the actual age when opposites start attracting each other? When a boy start realizing the beauty of a girl and girl start finding a boy cool or smart? Does that start at 14 or 15 or at 9-10 or at 4-5?? So as one of the interesting topics we used to have during our school time, this was having its own worth and that's why the topic floats every second day among we friends. So much discussions, so many stories but the age when the life actually starts was still a mystery. Among all those never ending stories of finding the "AGE", mine was very hardly accepted as it used to bring the average age of the topic abruptly down. So here I want to share mine simple and sadly ended story.
It was the time I was about to touch my 4 and just started going school. I was in "Shishu", the elementary class in Hindi medium schools. I made some friends those who are in my class but the story begun when I could not make friends which were not in my class. Strange but thats how the truth is ! I started liking a girl who were not in my class. An overeaten, flushy, cute girl. She was one of the prayer girls and certainly was in some 2-3 higher classes than me. My drama, I used to make while getting dressed for school turned to excitement to go to school, stand as on the front in the row and gaze her. How lovely she sung the Aarti and prayer. Detective, sleeping inside me woke up and decided to get all the possible information about her. And here the gr8 day came, when I saw her flying like a butterfly, here and there, in the lunch time. Thanks God for that, she was playing with my elder cousin sister. I just waited for the time when I could find my sister alone and I could ask for her. The day ended in school, the bell rang and we came back to home. The detective was biding his time and he got it when me and Didi finished our after school lunch. I went to her and asked her directly "Didi, apni us moti vali saheli se meri dosti kara do". No confusions, no delays. I was on my way to get her and first shot I had played. But what was that. Didi smiled at me, patted on my head and went away. God, What was that? It was like my hard core wish to be her friend was challenged.

cont.......